Yoga Roller Coaster

Yoga train...yoga bus...I call it the yoga roller coaster.

It has been 23 days(!) since I last practiced. It was time. My body was sending me signals that it is craving this yoga. My right arm at times has been feeling numb, tingly, like it's not getting enough circulation. No chest pains this time, thankfully. I started psyching myself up last night to make sure that I do not miss today's class. I was also determined to attend Bettina's class this morning. She just got back from Teacher Training, and I didn't want to miss the opportunity to see her today.

Today's practice sucked, as expected. Every joint of my body was rusty. My balance was totally off. For someone's sake, even my Toe Stand was a disaster. I initially dreaded the Camel, based upon how I was performing up to that point, but luckily I survived it, and not having told to hold the posture for a few (excruciating) extra seconds! Thanks, Bettina! :)

When the 90 torturous minutes were over, I was happy to lie in Savasana and take my time to enjoy my rest. I was very relieved to have survived this class after being away for so long. I am still not taking water during class, thank goodness, although I must admit that in the close to 9 months of being waterless, there were times when I wished that that security blanket was within reach. How I wish I can come every day. If I can't, I will somehow make up for it. May take longer than usual, but I'll get there. I have the rest of my lifetime to do so.

I am determined to do another 30 Day Challenge. I am thinking of doing it again in April 2011, to make it an annual April Challenge. My dearest mother passed away in April of this year, the day before the last day of my 30 Day Challenge. I am anticipating that every April from now on will be a sad month for me, so hopefully the Challenge will help me deal with my loss. And to pay tribute to the woman whom I adore, and love so much.

Good night, Mommy. I love you.

The Gift That Keeps On Giving

I discovered this yoga 17 months ago, and while I have had my lazy/not wanting to go days, I find myself being drawn to the hot room. What is it that brings me back to that hot, humid, sweaty, smelly room and be "tortured" for 90 minutes. I sound like a broken record each time I write this, but it is true. After that 90 minute torture, I feel like a million bucks. A bonus for me is that since I have not been taking water during class for the past 8 months, that first sip of Emergen-C spiked water feels like heaven. Another bonus is having to shower off all that sweat, cool off, and that million-dollar feeling is complete.

I consider this yoga as a gift that keeps on giving. I continue to share my experience outside the hot room and the studio. I have a bounce in my step, and my posture is very good. I share my blog entries to my friends and family, and I am ecstatic to hear that I have inspired some of them to try Bikram Yoga or for those who are already practicing, to continue to do so. For those who have tried it and conclude that it is not the workout for them, I still feel grateful that they did try. I am still hoping that one of my colleagues will one day overcome her fear of the heat and come with me to class.

I am in awe of my fellow yogis who are in their fifties and sixties. They look great and I admire their determination to keep up with, and/or inspire, the twenty-, thirty-, and forty-somethings to keep up with them! :) I will age, but I would like to do so gracefully, and I intend to keep practicing until I can no longer stand. If I can be a good example on how one can continue to feel young, then I know that I have given the best gift, the one that keeps on giving. Namaste.

Good night, Mommy. I love you.

When A Yogini Falls...

It happened at Standing Separate Leg Stretching. I planted my feet right on my mat sans towel, bent over, grabbed the sides of my feet, leaned forward to try to touch my forehead to the floor, then swoosh!!! The feet, by now slippery with sweat, had lost their grip on the mat, and down I go, backwards, then landed on my bum. I worried more about knocking Nancy over who was behind me, but luckily she was far back enough to be spared the domino effect. Oh my goodness, what a comedy! But, I am not one to dwell on mistakes (although sometimes, depending on the mistake, I tend to beat myself up), so I went right back into the posture. Second set was great, as I managed to get my forehead to touch the floor.

It was such a gorgeous day in my hometown of Victoria, BC today. The sun was shining, the air was cool and crisp, no rain, and one could get away with wearing a T-shirt and skirt (especially after hot yoga). I felt like a million bucks as I have just had the best workout ever!

Good night, Mommy. I love you.

Five Straight Days of Yoga = BLISS!!!

How can hot yoga be bliss, you ask? Ninety minutes of torture. Minimum 105 degrees Fahrenheit heat. 40% humidity. Sweaty (and smelly at times) bodies. Towels soaked to the max. Sweat splatters on the mirrors, obscuring your view of YOU. Aching joints and muscles. But my friend, as what our yoga teachers would always say, pain kills pain. No pain, no gain. Believe me, the moment you step out of the hot room, you will feel like a million bucks. Guaranteed.

I had planned on completing the 30 Day Challenge. I have had five straight, blissful days of yoga. While I tanked in the Standing Series, I finished strong during the Floor Series. Thank goodness for that. Unfortunately, though not feeling an ounce of regret, I had to take two straight days off, which broke the Challenge. My schedule just would not allow me the time to practice everyday. Doing doubles is out of the question. Personally, I believe that the Challenge is about 30 Days of Yoga...miss one day, then it's off. There are debates about this, as doing doubles will qualify one to complete the Challenge if some days are missed. But I will not dwell on this today. To each his own. Anyway, I digress. It's just too bad that I didn't complete my Challenge, but I let it go. I'm back tomorrow anyway. Thank goodness for Wednesdays off. Hubby will be home on Thursday, so I will try an evening class. I am curious as to how my body will perform at night time.

Those five consecutive classes were a mixed bag. My balance was definitely off. I still could not hold the Standing Head to Knee the whole time, although I can now hold my leg horizontally and sometimes bend my body down from the lower back with my elbows bent. Still not quite there, but I've made steady progress since I started practicing a year ago. My arms felt very heavy that I could not keep them parallel to the floor in preparation for Trikanasana. On the fifth day, I was successful in touching my forehead to the floor during Standing Separate Leg Stretching. My hamstrings are slowly getting stretched and the pain is lessening. So you see, one can never know how each class is going to turn out. There will be ones where you feel like you're in the best form, then the next day, you feel like walking out. The trick is to just hang in there and let each posture go once it's over. Just remember that you have the rest of your life to GET THERE. For now, just enjoy the journey. Namaste.

Good night, Mommy. I love you.

Back From The Brink

Blast! I have been AWOL from the hot room for a good three weeks and then some. I've had this spell of "no yoga" last year too, and around the same time of the year even. I used to be your 6:00AM yoga buddy last April when I did the 30 Day Challenge. Nowadays, that's out of the question. Too dark, too cold, too lazy. Blah-blah-blah.

Recently my body has been giving off signals that it is time to get my act together and get back into the yoga groove. My right arm has been feeling numb at times, and my chest muscles have been aching often enough to scare me into thinking that I was having a heart attack--yes, it was that painful. I've been gaining weight, too. It's very, very obvious that I have to go and take care of my body. Give it the stretching that it needs so badly. Give it the detoxifying that it needs to do.

So today was the day. I made sure I hydrated myself well with water and Emergen-C. No breakfast, no coffee in my belly. I didn't want extra luggage hindering the postures. Arriving with only a few minutes to spare, there was no way I'd find a hiding spot at the back of the room. I was surprised to find the whole first row on the right side of the room free--I guess no one wanted to be right up front today. So I had no choice but to be brave and hope for the best. I felt a little bit concerned about tanking in the Standing Series after being away for so long. I was very pleased with my Standing Head to Knee and Standing Bow Pulling Poses. The room was not that hot at all. I didn't sweat as much today, so my feet were slipping during the Triangle Pose, even with my trusty Yogitoes towel underfoot. I left the room with my towel dry in most places which is very unusual. Was it me, or was it the room, or the weather perhaps. Who knows? It certainly was a blessing somehow as I wanted to take it easy today.

So I am back from the brink. I hope to keep this momentum going. I am planning on being back tomorrow. Namaste.

Good night, Mommy. I love you.

"Do What You Can Today, and Do Not Judge Yourself"

It has been a rough 3 day homecoming to the hot room. After being away for 7 days, I was back last Saturday, and today's practice marked my third straight. I have been tanking in the Standing series for these past 3 days. Today at Pranayama, for the first time, I had to stop and take a few breaths. After the Eagle Pose, I had to lie down while the rest of the class took their first official water break. I am still not taking water during class. That, and staying in the room, are the two things that I am very determined to keep doing, whatever happens. I must admit that I felt very concerned about what has been happening. This has never happened to me before, since I started practicing over a year ago. I have had my bad days, but never 3 straight. My only consolation is the fact that my Floor series remain strong each time. I had to smile to myself when our teacher today said along the lines of "it's now the spine strenghtening series, which is our favourite, right?" I think that it is not everybody's favourite, but it sure IS mine :) Thank goodness for that!

I felt so much better when our teacher said that it is okay to do what we can do today, and to not judge ourselves. It is so easy to beat ourselves up whenever we have a bad class. I realised afterwards that there is no bad class in yoga. After all the sit downs, dizziness, stiff joints, etc., I still feel a million bucks. One practice at a time. Let the previous one go. Tomorrow's another day. Namaste.

Good day, Mommy. I love you.

It Felt Like The First Time!

I have been on yoga hiatus for 7 days. I guess this is the norm for some of us yogis during the summer, what with vacations and company coming...although I am sure that there are also some who can keep their regular practice going.

I have been enjoying my sleep-ins, but also missing my morning yoga. Last night, I psyched myself up to practice today. It's been really difficult for me to get the momentum back after being AWOL for a week, and not practicing my norm of 4-5 days a week. When I did the 30 Day Challenge, I felt as if I was on an adrenaline rush to keep going and going, like the Energizer bunny :) Those were the days when I attended the 6:00AM class during the work week!!! Nowadays I have not been getting up early enough to go back to it. For some reason, my body has not been in-sync with my mind. Sometimes my body wants to practice, but monkey mind takes over. Other days, my body wants to rest, but yoga mind wants to go and sweat it out in the hot room. As one of our teachers has said many times, "You walk the dog, don't let the dog walk you." So today, I would like to "walk the dog", and keep it that way hopefully so I will get my groove back sooner than later.

Ugh, my practice today was not the usual (or better). It felt like the first time I tried this yoga. I sat out for maybe half of the Standing series. I was out of breath, I was dizzy, and my body felt like a ton of lead. I always fare better during the Floor series, and I was relieved that that was the case today. Just before the Camel Pose I made up my mind to stay in the posture the entire time, especially since I know our teacher today will keep us holding it a few more (excrutiating) seconds longer during the second set. And true enough he did! As my head was upside down looking at the back wall and the rest of the class (I was up front by the way), and with majority of my fellow yogis getting out of the posture before the teacher said so, I was determined to stay put. And stay put I did, until just a second or two before he said "put your hands back on your hips...", letting out a grunt of relief (and triumph):)

As much as my practice today was not the best, I still felt great because:

1. I made it back to the hot room after being away for a week;
2. I managed to stay in the room, still not taking water during class even though monkey mind was tempting me to get the bottle from the change room;
3. I survived the killer second set in Camel Pose;
4. I was not afraid to be right up front, right close to the mirror. Normally I would stay at the back if I haven't been practicing regularly; and last but not the least...
5. I know my body and mind are thanking me for giving them this long overdue workout.

Good day, Mommy. I love you.