Wednesday, June 6, 2012
Today, the Mind Won
I practiced at my home studio today, taking my usual 9:00AM class. It felt like a homecoming. It felt good when people notice that you haven't been around. When they asked where I've been, I said, "I quit practicing for 3 months." What have these 3 yoga-free months accomplished? While I relished sleeping in and being able to do other things, my body protested at once. Suddenly, the aches started to arise. I couldn't get out of bed without feeling sore. The worst part was that my body started to seize up, so much so that mundane everyday movements, like shampooing my hair, triggered painful tweaks in my muscles, or joints, or nerves. Right now, my shoulder/right upper back area hurts. Sometimes it is so bad that my right arm becomes numb. Today's practice "sucked" from the physical standpoint. In Pranayama, I couldn't look back and keep my elbows raised above the heart. The first backbend was impossible. My neck hurt so much that there was no way it was going to be stretched back. While I was happy with Standing Bow Pulling Pose, for the first time ever since I started practicing 3 years ago, I couldn't do the Camel Pose. All because of this sore neck. But today, the mind won. I listened to my body. While I know it was thankful that I am getting back to a regular practice again, it told me that I have to take it easy. While I was failing to do some postures that I had been able to do in the past, I willed my mind to accept what my practice was TODAY. Today is all that matters. Yesterday's already past, and who knows what tomorrow will bring? What I so love about my Bikram Yoga practice is that I achieve this sense of peace and acceptance even outside the hot room. Right now, the cold, grey, autumn-like weather is very unusual for Victoria. A lot of people are complaining about it. So what will one achieve by complaining about something that cannot be changed. Same with my practice. I had come so far in the past by practicing on a steady, regular basis. And then I quit. So now, I know what it's like to quit. So now I know that I must keep a steady pace. Maybe a daily practice at this point in my life will not happen, but one day, when life changes, I know I will practice everyday...for the most part. Namaste, friends. Good night, Mommy. I love you.